As a queer person, I have always been expected to explain why I love who I love. 

When I came out to my father, he asked me why I’m gay. When I told him I hope to get married, he asked why. I couldn’t give him an answer. I was without words, without an explanation.

The first time I sat down to write this column, I felt the same nagging sensation in my gut — like I had to explain why I want to love. 

I spoke to a friend about this column and they asked me the same question:

“Why do you want to be married?”

But why am I expected to give a reason when millions of straight people are not? When straight people are encouraged to be married, why am I, as a queer person, questioned?

As I stumble into young adulthood, I’m not sure if the possibility of marriage is realistic anymore. Just over a decade after the Supreme Court legalized marriage equality in all 50 states, we are seeing one of the biggest pushbacks against the LGBTQIA+ community. 

Kim Davis, a former Kentucky county clerk, filed a petition this July, requesting the Supreme Court to overturn nationwide marriage equality, which would effectively hand the decision back to the states. 

This marks the first time in 10 years the Supreme Court has received an explicit request to overturn marriage equality. 

I have a feeling it will not be the last. 

The struggle to legalize same-sex marriage officially began in 1970, one year after the Stonewall Riots. Before that, the LGBTQIA+ community was already fighting for a multitude of rights —- the legal recognition of gender identities outside of the binary, access to gender-affirming healthcare, the freedom of expression without censorship and protection against hate crimes.

We fight, we win, and still, many try to take away the scraps of equality we have garnered. We have never been able to just love, uninterrupted.

Within our communities, every queer individual is thrown into the battlefield without any form of protection. In our personal lives, we have fought for comfortability in our mind and body, for validation from our family, our cultures, our religion. We deserve to be seen as more than the stereotypes we are continuously reduced to.

Across the federal administration, disconnected politicians try to choose our fate. They do not see the world with our eyes and step where we have, yet they try to dictate who we love.

We cannot let the pillar of LGBTQIA+ activism crumble.

This is not just a battle for marriage equality. Our nation is at a crossroads between democracy and facism. Do not let them take away everything before you fight back.

There does not need to be religious or societal factors in the act of marriage. It is so much more than that. It is an act of true love, a celebration of two humans coming together.

Two humans. Not just a man and a woman, but two individuals in love.

Can’t we all just be okay with that?

RESOURCES

The Lionel Cantú Queer Center is a queer resource center located on campus. They provide information about LGBTQIA+ counseling services, and guides to using correct pronouns. The Cantú Queer Center also provides support and resources for trans students in need of medical care, on or off campus. They are located at 633 Crown Rd, Santa Cruz, CA 95064, and can be reached by phone at (831) 459-2468.

The Santa Cruz Diversity Center is dedicated to providing a safe environment for the LGBTQIA+ community. They are located at 1117 Soquel Ave, Santa Cruz, CA 95062, and can reached by phone at (831) 425-5422.
The Trevor Project is a suicide prevention and crisis prevention hotline dedicated to 24/7 support. They can be reached by phone at (866) 488-7386.